10 May 2010

Winding me up

At 6:30 this morning, the daughter left on one of those damned school trips that I loathe so much.

I've spent the last two weeks getting her ready for that because there is always the getting ready. No matter how many rash guards and pairs of hiking boots are tucked away in this place, we never seem to have the right thing. Or someone has popped a patella and requires a walking stick.

Ridiculous.

The son finished his first AP exam last week, so the two weeks prior were a sorrowful little nightmare for him.

I seem to have my head back. Not fully intact, but better. Thinking doesn't hurt.

And on and on. And on. Annoying.

I continue to sit here in a holding pattern. Circling the same life I've been circling for the last year and then some. Enough, really. The decision before me is to pick up where I left off, or pick up a new thread altogether. It seems like such a small decision. But what I choose will change everything.

I made bread today. There is mercy in small things. And delay. But delay is not a viable alternative for much longer. Nor is it tenable.

Go listen to some music: "Winding Me Up" from the album Eve by The Alan Parsons Project.

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