12 January 2009

Heat wave

This morning, when the son and I left for the bus stop, it was 72F. A week ago, it was 40F. What a difference a week and Santa Ana winds make.

The air is unbelievably dry. Static crackles wildly and I get shocked just sticking my hand in the water coming out of the faucet.

Even the little goldfinches sounded crabby this morning, hopping branch to branch in a neighbor's liquidamber. They are no match for the wind, and it's more difficult to get a drink from a sprinkler head when the moisture evaporates immediately.

Still, I watched a crow playing on the currents this morning. It looked inordinately pleased with itself.

Here, though, no one likes the wind, and no one is especially happy. There were layoffs at the office on Friday, not wholly unexpected, but startling and depressing nonetheless. We know people who lost their jobs well before the holidays began. Only one has found another position.

The son is dragging his way through finals. I'll never forget Winter finals my freshman year of high school. I came down with chickenpox. He really doesn't know how easy he has it. We have a doctor's appointment on Wednesday to see to his knee. There was no evident bruising or swelling, but it remains a concern.

The daughter is perpetually fussed about friend issues, and homework issues, and the math test she did poorly on. "I'm nervous about the basketball game," she told me today. "Oh please," I groaned. "Don't start that. It's just a game. You'll make mistakes and blunders. Just forgive yourself now."

And me? I have reached the time of year when my fuse is short and I'm out of patience. Most of the issues are school-related, and it never fails that right about now, I want to pull the children out of school. Forever. It's no one thing, just a pile up of small issues (and some larger ones), and I'm trying to put my frustration into perspective: no one is lobbing bombs at me, my life is reasonably secure, it's mostly silliness from silly people. Still, I've never been particularly good at jumping through hoops.

Of course, the wind doesn't help.

We've been well over 80 the last few days. I wouldn't mind a return to winter. We need more rain, and the cooler temperatures were nice. Baking bread is much less appealing in a baking kitchen.

As well, I am trying to plan my escape, and roadblocks have been thrown up in my path. I expected this, knew it would happen, but no sooner do I make plans for one weekend, then I have to change everything to another. Has life always been this complicated?

No, I look back on last spring, and it was so much more complicated, I'm not entirely sure how I pulled it off.

Possessed.

And I'm only a work in progress.

Go listen to some music: "Heat Wave" from the album Prisoner in Disguise by Linda Ronstadt.

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